TL;DR: Mansplaining is definitely not the only kind of 'splaining.
Woman: 'Mansplaining' is when a woman is talking but...
Man (interrupts): The man swoops in and tries to explain things on her behalf.
(Upgraded to business class in hell, IMHO.)
Anyway, admire the irony of the situation. A man mansplaining 'mansplaining' to a woman, assuming that he knows more than a woman simply because he is a man and she is a woman-but, le sigh!
That’s not all. There are other kinds of ‘splaining too.
Before we get to that, here's another thought:
It is funny how mansplaining became so popular that we broke it into two and used the second half to create a new word- 'splaining. The buzzword for all know-it-all johnnies. A 'splainer' is always ready to cut you short, talk you down unnecessarily, and assume they know more than you. Anyway, these guys have existed since donkey's ears. It is only now that we've christened this outrageous behavioural hiccup---
'Splaining.
And when you name something, you yank it into clarity-grip by the scruff of the neck and legitimise it, even if it's something that's always been there, right before your eyes. Take, for example, grammarsplaining, straightsplaining, whitesplaining, journosplaining, and momsplaining. You knew of all these vices, right? It is almost formulaic. Any group that's ever tried to butt in and take the upper-hand in a conversation is one that qualifies as a 'splainer group.
Formula:
Common noun attributed to the group + the suffix '-splaining'
If I didn’t know better, I would say only a handful can be held accountable for ‘splaining! But given the sub-categories that have spawned off the father of all ‘splainers-the mansplainer-I am not so sure any more...
Grammarsplaining
Non-splainer: I love this piece...
'Splainer (interrupts) : Yes but the oxford commas aren't there-there are also too many punctuations- what is the need for those extra commas? I just don't get it-would anyone really take that many pauses in a sentence---
Dadsplaining
Non-splainer: The AC has stopped working again...
'Splainer (interrupts) : Back in my day, we used to sit under trees if required- electricity was never a problem- passion was a factor- struggle is very important in life- you should know that by now- the joke was that as long as one gets to poop and eat, one shouldn't ask for anything else-hahahahahaah---
Journosplaining
Non-splainer: Women are better off today despite huge setbacks...
'Splainer (interrupts) : I agree-but then when you scratch the surface you start thinking-are they really? India is among the 49 nations that still haven’t criminalised marital rape-statistically more than 63 million women are ‘missing’ across India-the number of rapes, just the ones reported, is disastrous enough- a 2017 report estimated that more than 21 million Indian girls are not wanted by their families-what would you say to that, huh?---
You get the idea, right? Pretty sure the internet is nursing more such phrases that are lurking here and there, but coming back to our peeps here, why should we leave out our parlour aunties, fathers, bosses, and nosey neighbours?
ParlourAuntysplaining
Non-splainer: Aunty, threading aur....
'Splainer (interrupts) : Face toh ruined hai-skin is also terrible-when did you get waxed last-who did your eyebrows this time-there are so many blackheads-you need a hair spa-split ends toh bharpoor hain---
Bosssplaining
Non-splainer: Yes, Maldives was beautiful, we went to this museum...
'Splainer: Things are beautiful when you take 7 days off work and go on a vacation-other leaves were cancelled because of ‘Beautiful Maldives’-I mean I am glad you had fun- but where were you the last five minutes-which break-you just took a 7-day break when we needed extra hands to fill in for you-did I tell you we cancelled other leaves---
Neighboursplaining/ Padosisplaining
Non-splainer: I am fine, aunty, uncle, thank y....
'Splainer (interrupts) : God bless you beta- beta who was the boy who came over late last night-must be a friend-very nice-you have got to be careful these days beta-my daughter is very obedient-I have strictly told her to stay away from boys-but very good beta-it is good to have friends- beta do you have some sugar in the house---
You get a fair idea, right? What gets a 'splainer going?
Imposition.
Let’s put it this way: You know when water trickles down leaves, washes away grime and settles into the thirsty earth? Yep, that’s perhaps how a ‘splainer feels once the deed is done. If only the plants needed watering in the first place.
Bottom Line: Guilty as charged?
(The above is a part of TLDR (Too Long. Didn't Read), a weekly blog that aims to crunch things down for you. I will give you the long and short of most things that need to be taken extremely seriously like your bookshelf, beer, existential dread, aimless conversations, rainy days and bubble-wrap. I promise to cater to all readers, but I brazenly harbour a soft-spot for skimmers, bathroom-readers and infinite scrollers. Now, let's bring the written word back!
P.S: Follow me @medhac1)
(At The Quint, we question everything. Play an active role in shaping our journalism by becoming a member today.)