Kaho Na...Pyaar Hai? Kaha Na...Pyaar Hai!
Not going to lie I did watch this film thrice in the theatre. Why? Na tum jaano, na hum. But twenty years later, I revisited the film and there were certain things that one just can’t miss. And...I know you’ll agree that if this film was made today...
It really shouldn’t be made today!
The movie starts with a dream (very ‘original’ for those times). Rohit (Hrithik Roshan) is dreaming about becoming a music sensation when he wakes up to reality. Little Amit (his so-called brother in the film) takes him for a ride and tells him it’s a Sunday.
Legit, no one ever forgot about a Sunday. That’s so 2000.
And...
If, 20 years later, you’ve figured what this means, please HMU...
Anyway, Rohit and Amit are on their way, cycling when they decide to give Sonia (Ameesha Patel) the fashion advice that changes her fate in the film.
Beauty is in simplicity.
And wait...why was she putting that thing anyway? Imagine if you were do something like that today, women of the world, your self-esteem would take a hit.
Now, let me make a major point here. It’s not like people didn’t have mobile phones in this film. Anupam Kher plays Sonia’s dad and he gifts her a swanky red car on her birthday. Now had he gifted her a mobile phone, the story would have unfolded differently.
But, why are ‘bad guys’ the only ones who have a mobile phone in the film?
Rohit is shown to be an aspiring singer and musician who approaches the owner of a hotel for a gig opportunity and guess who is friends with him? SONIA. What a coincidence, right? But he doesn’t get the gig. What follows is the most subtle audition.
Rohit’s shack (rehearsal room) is bang opposite to where Sonia’s friends are throwing her a birthday party and how can Rohit miss this chance?
From here, Rohit is the centre of attraction. Wherever he goes...ladies follow.
Okay, care to tell me...in which world do people give their clothes for ironing when they are already wearing them?
But anyway...Rohit makes it to the party where he continues to hog attention and Sonia is fuming with jealousy. It’s Christmas and for some reason, all the women are running to Rohit to kiss him and he’s standing there like a wall at an art fair waiting to be painted.
Now Sonia goes and starts to drink and Rohit joins her, next we know they are on a lifeboat in the middle of the ocean standing in the Titanic pose...expressing shock.
It’s so weird how what the seven-year-old you laughed at is what the 27-year-old you will squirm at.
Take this scene for instance, where Rohit runs after Sonia and takes off her skirt *forcefully* to make a flag.
Cut to...this dialogue that suggests that we have perhaps moved to better times where dialogues are written and characters are developed. Unlike this, where all you have to do is impose what the society thinks of women in a scene that probably should have been removed in the edit.
(It was a REALLY long film!)
‘Kaha Na...Pyaar Hai’ = I am your possession?
Rohit gets a second chance from Sonia’s dad and he’s at it...hard. He records a music album and honestly - a star is born. People start flocking to buy his album. He’s supposed to perform but then he dies.
And by now...you’re like “thank god” because you haven’t seen a more linear story than this.
Magar hero ke bina picture kaise?
Enter, Raj!
The difference between Raj and Rohit - his specs, his accent and he’s a rich boy from New Zealand!
Now see, if you find someone who looks exactly like your lover who died... it’s okay to stalk them, lie and break into their house. (Not)
Similarly, if you think you have fallen in love with a girl who came from India, who you haven’t had a full conversation with...it’s okay to click her pictures without her explicit consent. (Not)
Aren’t they a match made in heaven?
Rohit bechara faltu mein marr gaya.
I am sure you have heard people say that they have unrealistic expectations of love because they have seen it in films.
Like in Kaho Na...Pyaar Hai, when Raj gets to know that Sonia has left for India, he doesn’t have restrictions like visa or the cost of the flight ticket. He gets on the SAME flight as Sonia, no questions asked.
What a beautiful coincidence that both Rohit and Raj had a liking for music, otherwise this film wouldn’t have an end. The confidence with which Raj performed as Rohit on stage is something Rohit would never have been able to pull off.
But Rohit’s killers are out there. And Raj has to get to them in order to get Sonia. And do you know what helps catch them all in the end?
A mobile phone!
Remember I told you something about mobiles. No wonder we can’t do without mobile phones in 2020.
If you happen to watch this film again today, please ask yourself where were the police officers who came to arrest Sonia’s father (Anupam Kher) in the end all throughout?
But guess what...life goes on normally for Sonia. Raj and Sonia get engaged without the parents, anyone’s parents. Raj takes Amit like his own. Am I questioning this kid’s loyalties? Yes, I am.
So I guess, 20 years later Kaho Na...Pyaar Hai is just a bad childhood memory that you should perhaps...forget.
(At The Quint, we question everything. Play an active role in shaping our journalism by becoming a member today.)