There are no words to describe this feeling – You have a daughter whose education you have to take care of, a father who is ill and needs medical attention, you've lost your job, and you don’t know if you’ll survive the next hour as bombs are falling around you, left, right, and centre.
That's how my life has been for over two weeks – living in Lebanon. My name is Fouad Maurice Azar, a Lebanese citizen holding an OCI (Overseas Citizen of India) card who's currently trying to survive each second in Beirut.
While southern Lebanon was under Israeli target for almost a year, now the situation in Beirut is far from worse with Israel carrying out deadly air and ground raids across several localities of the Lebanese capital, including the city centre. Over 1,300 people have lost their lives and millions have been displaced.
'Countless Homeless, Hungry Struggling for Survival'
As the homes of thousands of people have been bombed in Beirut alone, many are now taking shelter on pavements, breaking into office complexes in search of a roof over their heads, or living in parking lots and cars.
The mosques, churches, and schools are overwhelmed with people trying to get shelter. As far as food is concerned, with high demand and no supply, the situation is grim to say the least. The scarcity of essential items has led to a rise in theft and other petty crimes as thousands of people struggle for both money and food.
There's some respite thanks to the efforts of the local NGOs and charitable organisations. Since the government neither has the money nor the ability to provide, one finds many local volunteers distributing meal boxes, diapers, baby milk, food, and medical items.
Lebanon is neither a vast country – it's only 10,452 square kilometres – nor does it have enough resources to feed people fleeing from the Bekaa Valley and other parts of the southern region.
In the hope of finding safety, these people came to settle around Beirut, but here too, they are being killed in the bombings.
'My Life – A Horrible Nightmare'
My situation is no different from my fellow Lebanese citizens. Being a single father of a 17-year-old girl, I am in constant fear for her life and her future. She was supposed to join college for a degree in physiotherapy, but that seems to have completely derailed.
In her early teens, she grew up fearing for her life during the COVID-19 pandemic. Now, in her late teens, she is witnessing bombings around her. She lives under the constant threat of losing her life or the lives of her loved ones. Imagine the impact such a situation has on her. Many children around us are living in a similar state of stress, affecting them both mentally and emotionally.
I lost my job as a freelance restaurant consultant, and right now, I am trying to survive on a job as an operation manager for a soft service company that supplies cleaning services, pest control, landscaping and logistics.
On a meagre salary, which I’m not even sure I will receive, it’s very difficult to take care of my family, especially my father, who is unwell and needs medical attention. While I try to buy some of his medicines with my salary, for others, I rely on local NGOs for free medication.
The only positive aspect of my life is that my mom is in Mumbai – and isn't with us to suffer through this mess.
'Living In the Hope of Being Evacuated'
While I have relocated to a safer location, about 35 km northeast of Beirut, and managed to secure some essential items like rice, lentils, and spaghetti that will last my family of four for a couple of months, with this kind of enemy, no one and nowhere is safe.
I have become a hostage in my own land. I have neither money, nor resources, nor the ability to leave this place. We are just stuck. Since my mom is Indian, we were fortunate during the 2006 Lebanon War when the Indian government evacuated all Indians and people of Indian descent.
But this time, we have yet to hear from the Indian embassy about evacuation. I hope they evacuate us soon before this catastrophe engulfs us.
In a statement on 3 October, India's Ministry of External Affairs said, "We are deeply concerned at the escalation of the security situation in West Asia and reiterate our call for restraint by all concerned and protection of civilians."
In addition, the Embassy of Lebanon in Beirut noted in a recent statement, "All Indian nationals already in Lebanon are also strongly advised to leave Lebanon. Those who remain for any reason are advised to exercise extreme caution, restrict their movements and remain in contact the embassy."
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