I love sex. I love masturbation. Sex is my favourite topic of discussion. Kinky sex excites me. Shower sex is my dream fantasy.
These are some of the things most of us want to say publicly, or without being squeamish, but are too shy to do so.
When I saw The Quint has launched the #MakeOutInIndia campaign a couple of days back, I got excited – primarily because now I could write about my favourite topic without any concerns.
Though I am a journalist, my graduate degree is in engineering, a field where skewed sex ratios are the norm.
What’s so Besharam About Sex Toys?
Almost a year back, I happened to chance upon a website “www.imbesharam.com”, apparently India’s first online sex toys store. I had never imagined that I would get so addicted to the website that I would spend the next few weeks checking out each and every product. From masturbators for men to role play costumes for women, they sold everything which one could imagine of.
Though I did have an idea of the different types of sex toys from porn and online articles, but the sheer diversity of sex toys being sold on that platform was quite impressive – fleshlight, edible lingerie, role play costumes and bedroom games – the list was endless.
Finally, temptation got the better of me and I bought a masturbator which was quite good to say the least.
Booming Online Industry
India’s online sex toys industry has been growing at a good pace in the past few years. Pegged at $453 million currently, it is expected to reach $1626 million by 2020, according to a report by the Economic Times.
Thatspersonal.com, ohmysecrets.com, masalatoys.in and fashionlovetoys.in are some of other platforms which sell toys. But, in my opinion, imbesharam’s product diversity is unmatched.
I thought I had joined the toy-using bandwagon quite late, but a chanced discussion with college friends in a café surprised me.
The mere mention of sex toys made them a little shy. But I carried on with my monologue.
“Is there even a toy for masturbation?” “Never heard of it, can you send me the link of the website where you bought it from”? “Is the experience more pleasurable than the real thing?”
These were some of the questions that I found myself faced with.
Silence of the Lamb
More recently, before deciding to write this, I posed a question to a group of friends on WhatsApp: “Hey, how many of you have used a sex toy before?”
There was complete silence till I repeated the question. But still, only one out of the seven answered “Not used it”.
Reality Check!
Yesterday, during another conversation with a friend, I realised that guys have the notion that sex toys are only meant for girls.
“Bro, but vibrators can only be used by women,” he said, which essentially meant that vibrator was the only toy he had heard of.
Such conversations with friends led me to the conclusion that while guys love sex and fantasise about it, the idea of using sex toys is still alien due to the taboo and attached stigmas.
Sex and Food are Similar
Despite everyone wanting to do it, few actually like to talk about it openly, leaving very less room for discussion. In fact, sex and food are quite similar to each other.
Both are human needs. Both can be explored in a million ways. Everyone wants both.
The critical difference – talking about sex is taboo, but food is not.
When food lovers meet, they talk about different cuisines, food festivals and good restaurants to eat at. But when sex lovers meet, they hardly discuss sex.
Therefore, when people aren’t willing to open up on sex, discussing sex toys is out of question.
But all I would say is that if you love sex, don’t shy away from exploring sex toys. Talk about it, discuss and share your experiences. Talking about sex doesn’t make you characterless, or a freakshow.
Don’t feel afraid to #MakeOutInIndia.
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