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‘Survived Marital Rape and Depression; Today a National Champion’

Surviving marital rape and three suicide attempts, Ekta Kapoor became a national champion in powerlifting.

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(If you feel suicidal or know someone in distress, please reach out to them with kindness and call these numbers of local emergency services, helplines, and mental health NGOs.)

Growing up in Nainital, Ekta Kapoor’s hardship began at a very young age. Raised by a single father, Ekta learnt to be independent and self-sufficient when she was young. She survived marital rape and severe depression at the age of 18, but today, she is a national champion in powerlifting and an international-certified personal trainer, boxing coach, kettlebell teacher and co-founder of MountStrong Personal Fitness Studio in Dehradun.

Her parents parted ways when she was merely 15-days-old, owing to conflicts. Ekta said that her fight against stereotypes started immediately after she was born as a girl.

“My mother abandoned me when I was very young. My extended family asked my father to put me up for adoption, stating that a single father cannot raise a girl child alone. But his love for me was pure. So, he decided to raise me on his own.”
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The 32-year-old fitness trainer speaking to The Quint said that bringing her up alone was tough on her father. She was often left in the care of her father’s relatives or her neighbours, as he was unable to juggle work and her. Ekta’s father worked as a teacher in Birla Vidya Mandir, a residential public school for boys in Nainital.

“I studied in an all-boys school where my father worked. The girl children of the school staff were allowed. Going to an all-boys school had a huge effect on my personality.”

Ekta said that it helped her in becoming an extrovert. As she was always inclined towards sports, her father's late hours at work gave her the opportunity to play outdoors with the boys in her school.

Ekta was hoping things would get better as she grew up, but little did she know that her life was not going to be smooth-sailing after all.

“Things, however, started taking an ugly turn as I grew up. As a motherless child and due to family and societal pressures, I was married off when I was barely 18. I suffered grave disturbances in my marriage as my husband was involved in an illegal business.”

Ekta soon returned to her father and convinced her family that she was going to file for a divorce. But she was forced to give in to societal pressure once again and return to live with her husband.

As a teenager, Ekta was unable to comprehend the chaos in her life and went into depression. Mental trauma and marital rape followed, and Ekta decided to end her marriage.

“I was not ready for any physical relationship with that man who was still my husband, just for namesake. Hence, I faced marital rape which in our so-called society doesn’t come in the category of rape. I was mentally torn apart. My mental health took a toll, and I tried to kill myself thrice.”

Ekta became physically weak and when she found out that she was pregnant, she did not have the choice of abortion because her immune system was feeble. She had to undergo several medical procedures to stabilise her health and pregnancy. Ekta tried to move on with her life as a single mother, but her mental health was affected. Her daughter was her only motivation.

“My daughter’s birth was like a silver lining in my life. Eventually, she became the source of motivation for me to move forward and realise the purpose of my life.”
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After her child’s birth, Ekta decided to become self-reliant and financially independent. To secure her daughter's future, Ekta did her MBA in Finance Management and moved to Mumbai in 2014 with her child and worked in a bank for a year.

“I was not satisfied with the work I was doing. Then suddenly, I realised that it was in front of my eyes all these years, but I never looked at it.[sic.] The only thing that gave me immense pleasure was and always will be health and fitness.”

Then, Ekta started a career in the fitness industry. She joined a number of certification courses and tried her hands at martial arts as well. Soon after, she started training in gyms, she became an internationally certified personal trainer. Since she started as a fresher, Ekta had little or no experience. She took guidance from Shanshank – a senior from the industry, who hailed from her home town. Soon, the duo started to participate in competitions.

“I dedicated myself fully to accomplishing my goals. It felt as if the child in me screamed with joy, and I felt alive after so many years.”

In 2015, Ekta became a national champion in powerlifting and in 2018, she was crowned as the Strongest Woman of India. Ekta now runs a premier fitness training studio in Dehradun, with her life partner Shashank.

Ekta will soon be representing Asia in the powerlifting category in the World Championship.

“I want to share my life’s story and experiences, in hope that even if it impacts the life of one woman who has experienced something similar or a greater ordeal. I want to inspire and motivate, to bring about a positive change in their lives.”

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