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A Serial Offender’s Guide to Mental Health Vocabulary

Guilty as charged?

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Spaz. Retard. Paranoid. OCD.

I cannot tell you what to say and what not to say. This isn't one of those articles. But it is a article that will make you point out a grammatical error in this line. It will then ask you to stop obsessing over grammatical errors. As your frustration builds, this piece will loosely compare your persistent tendency to fix grammatical errors to an obsessive compulsive disorder.

Don’t cringe yet. This article will casually throw around a whole lot of these ‘words’.

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That’s right, this IS one of those articles.

Why should you care about an entire piece on 'words' when you can be sharing a meme or a joke? Pick that meme. The one with the illustration of a mother telling her child to clean his room. You know, the one where her habit is being compared to OCD or Neurosis.

I’ve had enough of those boring, lengthy pieces that preach about how freedom of expression is a responsibility. 

Frankly, it is depressing to read such preachy articles. Is this what patients diagnosed with 'depression' feel like?

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I did try asking a college friend once who was supposedly ''undergoing therapy''. She said my questions reminded her of Salman Khan – Remember the time he compared his exhaustion from a physically demanding shoot to that of a “raped woman”?

She was one of those friends whom you'd call socially awkward and extremely clumsy. I remember one of our walks back home from college, when she tripped and fell (for the fifth time that day). “Spaz,” I shouted out, only to receive a nasty look from a lady passing by.

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Why did she have to get so paranoid about our banter? I have always managed to stay away from such nasty looks. They make you reflect. Reflections are tiring, unless, perhaps, you are getting paid for them.

Why is everyone so touchy about my ‘words’? I don’t get why they make such a big deal out of it. Alas, I’m always accused of committing this crime: “Insensitive appropriation of terms used to describe legit clinical disorders.’’

I am taking this bit by bit and have decided to count sheep, at least ten of them, before saying something. Maybe then, they’d get off my back.

If you’ve read this far, then all I want you to do is to count the number of these ‘words’ that you’ve used today. How did you fare?

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That’s right, this IS one of those articles.

Why should you care about an entire piece on 'words' when you can be sharing a meme or a joke? Pick that meme. The one with the illustration of a mother telling her child to clean his room. You know, the one where her habit is being compared to OCD or Neurosis.

ADVERTISEMENTREMOVE AD
I’ve had enough of those boring, lengthy pieces that preach about how freedom of expression is a responsibility. 

Frankly, it is depressing to read such preachy articles. Is this what patients diagnosed with 'depression' feel like?

ADVERTISEMENTREMOVE AD

I did try asking a college friend once who was supposedly ''undergoing therapy''. She said my questions reminded her of Salman Khan – Remember the time he compared his exhaustion from a physically demanding shoot to that of a “raped woman”?

She was one of those friends whom you'd call socially awkward and extremely clumsy. I remember one of our walks back home from college, when she tripped and fell (for the fifth time that day). “Spaz,” I shouted out, only to receive a nasty look from a lady passing by.

ADVERTISEMENTREMOVE AD

Why did she have to get so paranoid about our banter? I have always managed to stay away from such nasty looks. They make you reflect. Reflections are tiring, unless, perhaps, you are getting paid for them.

Why is everyone so touchy about my ‘words’? I don’t get why they make such a big deal out of it. Alas, I’m always accused of committing this crime: “Insensitive appropriation of terms used to describe legit clinical disorders.’’

I am taking this bit by bit and have decided to count sheep, at least ten of them, before saying something. Maybe then, they’d get off my back.

ADVERTISEMENTREMOVE AD

If you’ve read this far, then all I want you to do is to count the number of these ‘words’ that you’ve used today. How did you fare?

(At The Quint, we question everything. Play an active role in shaping our journalism by becoming a member today.)

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