Dear Piyali Ganguly, Your Letter on Sridevi’s Death Is Inhumane!

The intentions and the message might be good, but this disgraceful letter is something we don’t need today, or ever!

Sridevi passed away on 24 February 2018

(Photo: Yogen Shah)

Bollywood legend Sridevi’s death has left us numb and speechless. Her aura and personality is irreplaceable. Today as the world mourns, shares grief and offers prayers on all mediums, one such article or message is being circulated, which I feel is a disgraceful and mean, as the author points out something, which I believe he/she is not directly related to in any manner.

The intention and the message behind writing this article may be to pass and create awareness.

Here’s what Piyali Ganguly wrote.

‘Her implants, weight loss and excess doses of Botox shots regularly could also be the cause of Cardiac arrest.’

‘While we are all mourning the untimely demise of Sridevi, it is important to remember why this may have happened to her. Society demanded that she stay slimmer/look younger than a 40 year old, 50 year old and plus 50 woman needs to be. Hence, the continuous surgeries.’

‘When I met her about 5 years ago, she was beautiful but a sad version of that self that we loved so much in a movie like Chandni. What a lot of pressure to keep her weight down, to make sure that her face had no wrinkle lines, continuous clinic visits in Southern California. As a friend of mine, Dipanwita Basu wrote this morning, do we need a #metoo movement in fashion, #notsize0?’ 

‘Milan has already implemented this but these patriarchical implants were in her head -- the husband, who claimed to love her so much should have intervened, did he love the way she looked as his arm candy more than he loved her? She herself did not trust in her own beauty -- she was a clothes horse for whoever would care to dress her.’ 

‘What I conclude is she had such a lack of love for oneself and such a lack of self-esteem that her own lips didn’t suffice, her own face was not good enough, her flesh and blood had to be sucked out of her so that she could wear the best of couture. That is the sadness of a life that could have been lived so much better not just for her but for her daughters. What a terrible legacy for her girls.’ 

What irks me is the language used in the communication here, as it clearly reflects the emotion she wanted to share!

Accepted, that she was moved by this news too, but the mind wanders to the surgeries and additional factors which not only Sridevi, but a million other people in the world also are used to.

My point is if a treatment of any kind is clinically available, and being offered by popular verified doctors, and given only at the discretion of some warnings and conditions, what is the worry!

Isn’t choosing a way to live, a personal choice? What is wrong if one chooses implants, shots or any form of medication or treatment to make themselves feel good and confident. As a mere spectator, one only has the right to share awareness, and not use bitter, harsh and shallow words like the ones mentioned in the article.

The author, Piyali, does not in any manner, have the right to question what Sridevi’s husband Boney Kapoor thought or should have done.

‘Milan has already implemented this but these patriarchical implants were in her head -- the husband, who claimed to love her so much should have intervened, did he love the way she looked as his arm candy more than he loved her?’

Piyali Ganguly

As disturbing as these lines are, Piyali’s statements here question a bond between two people, she has no direct relation. Questioning one’s integrity on love and emotions, and calling someone ‘arm candy’ is shameful! What disturbed me the most are these lines, which I’m sure many like me, who looked up to her for her style and fashion, would agree with my thoughts.

‘She herself did not trust in her own beauty -- she was a clothes horse for whoever would care to dress her. What I conclude is she had such a lack of love for oneself and such a lack of self-esteem that her own lips didn’t suffice, her own face was not good enough, her flesh and blood had to be sucked out of her so that she could wear the best of couture.’

Piyali Ganguly

The way one wants to carry themselves, in any clothes, offered or bought, is one’s opinion and choice. Today, many of us choose to lose weight as we want to look better, fit, and fabulous. Being an icon and superstar, Sridevi inspired many of us with the aura she carried, irrespective of her age.

She was someone who everyone was impressed with and loved, ever since she was a child, for what she did was many who wished to, and do wish even today.

‘That is the sadness of a life that could have been lived so much better not just for her but for her daughters. What a terrible legacy for her girls.’ 

Piyali Ganguly

Dear Piyali. It was her life and her daughters, and the way they have grown and groomed is something we all have seen. Talking about the life being better, it always was for Sridevi, and let’s leave it to that! 

A massive cardiac arrest is an unfortunate incident to happen, which took her away from all of us. But the reason for this is unknown and I’m sure, it is not what you have mentioned.

And mind you, legacy is something she has left, for the whole fraternity and the world thinks she is irreplaceable, for what she delivered in her career and life. So people like you, who show interest in interrogating in others’ life, unfortunately after death (or on the same day) should look into yours and see if you are preparing yourself to leave behind something which you and your beloved circle will be proud of. With this article, I certainly do not think so!

Sadly, views like this, add a lot of bitterness and hatred in lives. Rather than sharing the message, you focused to point out something which is ‘NONE OF YOUR CONCERNS’. The words you chose, the way you communicated, sadly is shallow, disgraceful, mean and filthy. Stop poking into people’s business. If you want to share something, there are better words to choose and a better way to share!

PS: Even if you knew Sridevi and were related to her up, close and personal, this is not the right time, or day, or the way to communicate a message. Sorry! It is way too bad!

(This was first published on Mumbai Live and has been republished here with permission.)

(This is an opinion piece and the views expressed above are the author’s own. The Quint neither endorses nor is responsible for the same.)