Satire: Soon, Aadhaar to Make Its Bollywood Entry

Aadhaar has entered our lives in a big way. What if it comes into our movies too?

Aadhaar makes an entry in our movies

(Photo: The Quint)

After Aadhaar's appearance in our lives, it’s set to make a dramatic entry in our movies too. And why not, the time seems just about right for India’s mighty IT inclusion project to get to shape its own narrative as well.

It’s been confirmed that UIDAI will propose changes to existing films and make Aadhaar mandatory for all movies going forward. Our extraterrestrial friend Jaadoo, for instance, will get his own Aadhaar card. With Lord Hanuman and Tommy Singh the dog facing no difficulty in getting their respective Aadhaar cards, it shouldn’t be difficult for the alien to get one.

With the coming of Aadhaar, the daring super-thieves that long enthralled audiences with their elaborate, meticulous heists, are also planning to go digital. The budget of the upcoming Dhoom sequel has shrunk considerably, as a result.

The catchy All izz Well tune is to be played in case any character starts screaming “data breach”.

It’s also being speculated that UIDAI could order a ban on double-role movies, given that Aadhaar cards will resolve the problems of identification faced in Seeta and Geeta, Judwaa, among many others. The Bollywood community, that routinely banks on the formula, is obviously not too happy with the news.

After Toilet: Ek Prem Katha’s portrayal of the ‘success’ of Swachh Bharat Abhiyan, the world's largest biometric ID system is next in line to develop its own saccharine feature film.

As expected, tickets will have to be purchased by furnishing your Aadhaar card.

The wine and cheese community, as a veteran journalist identifies them, has already begun criticizing the movie even before its announcement. What does the ‘Netflix watching’ junta know anyway?

Editor: Purnendu Preetam
Camera: Shiv Kumar Maurya