Watch Out For These Couples Who Make You OD On Love

This Valentine’s stay away from these 5 types of couples!

Over-sharing and over-bearing. Couples that make you hate love! (Photo: iStockphotos)

Dear February, why you do this? Why do you give a ‘love charger’ boost to the awesome twosomes? Why, oh why, do we have to suffer at the hands of overly romantic fiends on a mission to spread diabetes (of the love overload kind) on our Facebook feeds?

According to unrecognized and unnamed medical sources (because we totally want to sound legit!) the ‘so in love’ bacteria is never dormant, it is always on full display. It is just that our tolerance for such BS is at an all-time low in Feb and that makes us totally lose it! Just to make things easier on mind, body and soul, below is our pick of the top 5 kinds of couples you should stay away from at all times –

1. The Nick-Name(r)s

Real, original names are never enough for this couple. They mark their territory by giving nick-names to each other. But when they start referring to each other as baby/boo/shona/jaanu in public with a certain lilt in their voice, it’s time to run!

Hand us the sick bag, we might just barf! 

2. The Siamese Twins

They are the ‘do jism ek jaan’ kinda couple. You never see them doing ANYTHING alone. They are a tag team like no other! After coupling they only refer to themselves as ‘we’ – ‘We thought the movie was so boring’; ‘we can’t wait to hang out with you guys’; ‘we totally love it’. WTF are personal opinions, right?

Mooooommmm, they’re scaring us! 

3. The Drunk-In-Love Couple

This couple takes inspiration from Pinterest and floods our Instagram and Facebook with pictures of them having a staring match captioned ‘I could get lost in those eyes’. Ummm, yeah we wish both of you could get lost somewhere!

Please just stop with ‘Let’s show’em how it’s done’ 

4. The Anti-Single Couple

This couple is on a mission to hook you up with somebody or anybody! If you’re single and in their line of vision then be prepared for their over-zealousness to get you matched up with creepy neighbours, random friends or even people off the street.

We’ll stick to our business, thank you! 

5.The Prototype Couple

Do not, repeat DO NOT, go to this couple for any relationship advice. They use theirs as a prototype that the world needs to follow. Sample this – ‘So your bae cheated on you? Well guess what the same sh*t happened last week when X ate the last slice of the cake in the fridge! But bro, sometimes you just gotta let them go!’ Huh?!

If we needed advice we’d go to Dr Phil 

Two’s a company, three’s a crowd; take your mush away from our faces if you don’t want us to scream at you loud!