Q&A With a Porn Star: ‘Don’t Trust Everything You See in Porn!’

“One of the reasons I left porn was, the industry became very misogynistic – the spitting at women, the violence.”

Don’t use porn as a resource to learn about sex.

(Photo: iStock)

I have met Sunny Leone a few times, I have seen her act. She is a big Bollywood star now, right?

Adam Glasser (Porn name: Seymore Butts)

Indians are binging on porn. We are ranked the third largest consumer of porn in the world, and this year we are tipped to grab the second spot – only behind the dominant porn superpower, United States of America.

Even the decrease in mobile data rates in 2016 resulted in a 75% increase in the number of Indians watching porn.

We have another 200 million people getting internet access in the next year or so, we have the largest adolescent population in the world, we have no sex education, and we have easy access to PornHub. And although we now have a former pornstar as one of our most popular celebrities, we still don’t openly talk about pornography in India.

Adam Glasser.(Photo Courtesy: Aditya Gautam)

What better way to start a candid conversation on the subject, than to interview one of the most prolific porn director-producer-actors out there – Adam Glasser (Seymore Butts).

The man has worked on hundreds of porn films and has been an integral part of the American porn industry for decades, about all things porn. He is also an author of the book Rock Her World: The Sex Guide for Modern Man.

Getting paid to have sex with attractive people – you were living the dream Adam, where you not?

First of all, not every man can be a pornstar. There are size issues, you will have to be an above average-sized guy.

Secondly, you have to be able to perform in a situation that is somewhat unnatural – in front of other people, being told what to do, when to do it and how to do it. Also, you have to have sex with people you don’t find attractive, or you don’t get paid that day.

Some girls are lesbians in real life, but they have sex with men for money. They have no interest in guys, but they do it, for money. Similarly, there are men who are not gay, but they do gay porn because that pays more.

In my experience, 95% of the male performers use some sort of erectile enhancement medication. And all that anal sex you see in porn, there is a lot that goes on behind the scenes to make that possible, a lot.

The porn industry has been growing exponentially in the past few decades. Has the industry changed over the years?

One of the reasons why I got out of the industry was that the industry became very misogynistic in its ways. The chocking women, the spitting at women, became more and more depicted in the movies. This was concerning for me because for me, it had always been about consent, and people experiencing pleasure – both parties, all parties, no matter how many people were there.

Now there is obviously a market for the hardcore content out there. Otherwise, they wouldn’t keep producing it. But that material is made to fulfil a certain edge or fantasy; it is not indicative of what should be done or what you should do in your private life.

The cover of Adam Glasser’s book.(Photo Courtesy: Aditya Gautam)

As one of the fastest growing porn consumers, are there lessons we Indians should learn from America, a country that has been on top of the porn binge ladder since the beginning?

Firstly, don’t believe everything you see in porn. No matter how real or spontaneous the movies seem, none of it is.

Secondly, start openly discussing the subject.

Listen, we have a large religious population here in America as well, who are not comfortable talking about this subject. But they are beginning to come around as they realise there is no other way; we need to communicate. They are finding out that this is the only way to approach this as parents and couples.

I bet that communication between couples about sex is not common in an Indian household. There is no problem with asking your partner, what do you like? What do you want me to try out? I bet many of the women there don’t even know what they like, because no one has ever asked them and they have never considered it themselves. I know this because this is exactly how it was in America.

A quick tip for all men – how do you blow a woman’s mind in bed? Be concerned about her pleasure. Trust me, it will go such a long way.

Any memorable experience from your porn career?

There is something called female ejaculation. It was not talked about even in America. But I started making movies about it. Women, for years, thought women were urinating in bed when they were having sex. But it’s just a normal process which is now called female ejaculation. I had so many women who contacted me and thanked me for making those movies. They told me how they were surprised that other women do it too. So that was really nice, to be a part of that.

We have no real sex education in India and porn is filling that gap. What are your thoughts on that?

Well, watching porn without context can be dangerous. For example, if you are a man who is watching porn in which a woman is being choked, and you think that’s what you are supposed to be doing and you do that to the next woman you are having sex with. Then that has made you more aggressive because that’s a very aggressive move which should not be done unless there is explicit consent.

So that’s what I am saying, as an educator, porn is a tool that cuts both ways. You can take it for the possibility that is presented, and ways in which people can enjoy it. And with every type of sex you can name that people enjoy, I can show you people who do not enjoy that type of sex. There is nothing that sweeps across the board, except maybe orgasm, haven’t met anyone who does not enjoy an orgasm.

Any final message to India?

Sex is a good thing, sex is not a bad thing. That’s number one. Sex is not only for procreation, it is also for pleasure for all people involved. And safe sex is the best kind of sex. I would suggest that people read books and use resources other than porn to educate themselves about sex.

(Aditya Gautam is the author of ‘Pornistan: The sex education you did not receive in school’, available on Amazon. You can follow him on Facebook and Instagram as adityagautam001)