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(Trigger Warning: Some questions could make you feel agitated. Reader discretion is advised.)
Sexolve is equal rights activist Harish Iyer’s Q&A space on FIT.
If you have any queries regarding sex, sexuality, or your relationship, and need some advice, answers, or just someone to hear you out – write to Harish Iyer, and he’ll try and ‘sexolve’ it for you. Drop in a mail to sexolve@thequint.com.
This week’s Q&As are below:
Dear RainbowMan,
I am a 28 year old man who loves wearing womens panties. I used to steal my girlfriend’s panties and my mother’s panties and dress in them.
My girlfriend knows about it now and at first she found it weird, but now it is our secret sexual game.
I wonder if this would lead to me becoming a woman? Or transgender? Or is this the first step towards becoming gay?
I have had no interest in men per se.
I also don't feel like getting an operation done to get rid of my penis.
I love my penis.
I wonder but if my actions of wearing panties are a symptom of the gay or transgender infection?
WonderMan
Dear WonderMan,
Thank you for writing in.
Not everything that happens in our lives has to mean that we are transforming into something else.
Sometimes we can look at things the way they are and acknowledge them for just that.
Sexuality and gender are not infections. They are caused by no bacteria or virus. They have no causative factor.
Gay men don't by default love wearing panties.
All transgender women are not woman panty lovers. You could be interested in some garment or the other.
And this is regardless of gender or sexuality.
You are gay or transgender when you know and ascertain that you are gay or transgender.
You will not “become” one, you cannot “become” one.
Much love
Rainbow Man
P.S. wear what you love, love what you wear. :)
Dear RainbowMan,
I am a 32-year-old man going through a bitter divorce.
I haven't masturbated or had sex for the past 4 years.
I think I will lose my potential to produce sperms in a few years.
And maybe if I don't have sex in the next 2 years, my body may not make sperms, so I may not become a father.
Can you please guide me?
Worried Man
Dear Friend,
Thank you so much for writing to me.
I am sorry to hear about your bitter divorce. Things can get sour when we exit from relationships. I wish you and your ex the best of health and a fruitful independent life post this marriage.
So if you are healthy and producing sperms regularly, you are in a young age and there is time for andropause.
However, do not take my advice or any other online advice seriously. Visit a doctor who specialises in fertility, and get them to check the motility of your sperms.
Give yourself some time to rejuvenate and bounce back from the stress of divorce.
Smiles
RainbowMan
P.S. please visit a specialist
Dear RainbowMan,
I am a 43-year-old woman.
My husband is 45 and he has male breasts that are asymmetrical. Could this be possible? Is this some disease?
Wifey
Dear Wifey,
Thank you for writing in.
Yes, breasts could be asymmetrical in men, women and all genders.
You should however urge your husband to visit a doctor for a physical examination and further advice.
Love
RainbowMan
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