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Too caught up to read this story? Listen to it, instead.
A person’s sexual desire or libido can get affected because of various reasons. Not finding their partners attractive is rarely one of them. No matter how much we overlook it, sexual anxiety is a real thing.
When someone has a higher libido as compared to their partner, it's highly likely for them to feel unattractive or unwanted by their other half. This leaves them standing in front of the wall of rejection, beyond which they are unable to see the real problem behind the issue.
While its completely normal to feel nervous when under the sheets or not feel like having sex, the repetition of this feeling can affect a relationship. But it’s not just one of the two partner’s fault, neither is it one person’s responsibility to fix it.
In most of the cases, people choose to blame their partners for their own feelings of sexual rejection, but the reasons behind not wanting sex can be several.
And for the partner with low libido, the blame can make them turn further away from sex.
One might avoid sex when the relationship appears to lack intimacy, or when they are stressed or depressed. In some cases, it can happen if they are suffering from medical illnesses or if they have negative past experiences. But many times, it’s also because of their daily life pattern, and the exhaustion that accompanies work life. None of these mean that they don’t love their partner.
For someone who struggles with sex, having a partner with a higher libido just adds more weight to their already existing stress. Sometimes they might even end up feeling that they are wanted by their partners for nothing but sex.
Even bringing up the topic of not having sex in front of someone who is trying hard to get there, can lead to drowning in an ocean of toxic emotions about themselves. In such situations, they often give up and have sex just to please their partner.
If your partner doesn’t feel free enough to tell what going on inside, how will you ever be able to address the issue, or resolve it?
It isn’t really that difficult to find a solution, but first - Listen to understand.
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Published: 09 May 2019,03:02 PM IST