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‘Big’ News: Penis Implants Are Here, Available in L, XL and XXL

This is no spam! Penis implants are here and available in 3 sizes, L, XL, XXL

Nikita Mishra
Fit
Updated:
Because everyone thinks bigger is better! (Photo: The Quint)
i
Because everyone thinks bigger is better! (Photo: The Quint)
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It’s one of the ‘biggest’ medical breakthroughs of current times. A surgeon in the United States has made it possible for any man with money to get equipped like a Spartan!

If you can spare over ten lakh rupees, book tickets for Los Angeles, set up an appointment with Dr James Elist – a mere 45 minutes procedure will jack you below the belt with a bigger, stronger willy that won’t leave anyone dissatisfied!

The implant comes in three sizes, L, XL and XXL, because nobody wants a medium!

True story.

What To Expect From the Procedure?

With all sorts of boobs, hips, vagina surgeries available for women, it is only fair that men can now get one for their schlongs (Photo: Tumblr/@MULTITUDEOFGIFS)

More than a decade back, a silicone implant named, Penuma, was approved by the US FDA for penile transplants. Currently, Iranian-born US-based, Dr James Elist, is the only surgeon in the world who is allowed to do the procedure. Believe it or not, more than 1,300 men have already visited him to increase the size of their manhood.

Here’s how the operation goes: After an anesthesia, the doctor will roll the foreskin, insert a silicone implant and stitch the skin with the original penis.

Surprise! Within an hour, you wake up with double the size of your boner.

Hospitalisation lasts for a day or two and antibiotics for a fortnight. Patients are advised to refrain from strenuous physical exercise for a month and sex for 4 months so the organ heals completely. Like a boob job, the implant is very much permanent, aesthetic and can’t be detected with touch.

The surgery comes with a 95% success rate.

Those who have got the surgery told the GQ magazine, that it’s been life-changing. A plumber from Northern California, got himself beefed up to size XL, his wife tells GQ that, “he has erections all day long, every day now. We haven’t had this much sex since we first got together.’

Please note: The wife did not say the sex was better.

Should the Penis Size Change or Our Perception Of It?

Size matters, sadly not just in bed! (Photo courtesy: Tumblr)

According to the Journal of Urology, an average penis is around 5 inches long, 4.5 inches wide in circumference. Yet, by conservative estimates, many studies say that more than 50% men are dissatisfied by the size of their Johnson!

Centuries of cultural stereotyping and porn have hardwired our minds into glorifying the size of a penis. A lot of people forget one important thing: size doesn’t always matter, if you know how to use it! But men are horribly judged, evaluated and tricked into believing their manhood depends up on the size of their junk.

Honestly, similar to how everyone goes up in arms against body, weight and shape issues when it comes to women, it’s time we stopped judging ‘manhood’ by how long or thick it is and don’t make anyone feel inadequate about what’s hanging in between their legs.

So men, there’s no pressure to go under the knife for the sake of vanity but if you want to enhance the size of your package for medical reasons, go for it.

What To Expect From the Procedure?

With all sorts of boobs, hips, vagina surgeries available for women, it is only fair that men can now get one for their schlongs (Photo: Tumblr/@MULTITUDEOFGIFS)

More than a decade back, a silicone implant named, Penuma, was approved by the US FDA for penile transplants. Currently, Iranian-born US-based, Dr James Elist, is the only surgeon in the world who is allowed to do the procedure. Believe it or not, more than 1,300 men have already visited him to increase the size of their manhood.

Here’s how the operation goes: After an anesthesia, the doctor will roll the foreskin, insert a silicone implant and stitch the skin with the original penis.

Surprise! Within an hour, you wake up with double the size of your boner.

Hospitalisation lasts for a day or two and antibiotics for a fortnight. Patients are advised to refrain from strenuous physical exercise for a month and sex for 4 months so the organ heals completely. Like a boob job, the implant is very much permanent, aesthetic and can’t be detected with touch.

The surgery comes with a 95% success rate.

Those who have got the surgery told the GQ magazine, that it’s been life-changing. A plumber from Northern California, got himself beefed up to size XL, his wife tells GQ that, “he has erections all day long, every day now. We haven’t had this much sex since we first got together.’

Please note: The wife did not say the sex was better.

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Should the Penis Size Change or Our Perception Of It?

Size matters, sadly not just in bed! (Photo courtesy: Tumblr)

According to the Journal of Urology, an average penis is around 5 inches long, 4.5 inches wide in circumference. Yet, by conservative estimates, many studies say that more than 50% men are dissatisfied by the size of their Johnson!

Centuries of cultural stereotyping and porn have hardwired our minds into glorifying the size of a penis. A lot of people forget one important thing: size doesn’t always matter, if you know how to use it! But men are horribly judged, evaluated and tricked into believing their manhood depends up on the size of their junk.

Honestly, similar to how everyone goes up in arms against body, weight and shape issues when it comes to women, it’s time we stopped judging ‘manhood’ by how long or thick it is and don’t make anyone feel inadequate about what’s hanging in between their legs.

So men, there’s no pressure to go under the knife for the sake of vanity but if you want to enhance the size of your package for medical reasons, go for it.

(At The Quint, we question everything. Play an active role in shaping our journalism by becoming a member today.)

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Published: 01 Feb 2016,06:38 PM IST

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