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Filmmaker Ram Gopal Varma, who directed Sridevi in films like Great Robbery, Govindhaa... Govindhaa... and Hairaan, says that the late actress has been a "very unhappy woman" and her life was a "classic case of how each person's actual life is completely different from how the world perceives it".
Sridevi, 54, died on Saturday in a Dubai hotel bathroom. The autopsy report called it an "accidental drowning" in the bathtub. In a personal note on her, Varma says that she was the most desirable woman and the biggest superstar of the country but that's just a part of the story.
Varma says that he was aware about her life from the time he first met her for his film Kshana Kshanam. "I saw with my own eyes how her life was like a bird in the sky till her father's death and then became like a bird in a cage due to her overprotective mother. In those days, actors used to be only paid in mostly black money and due to fear of tax raids her father used to trust friends and relatives who all betrayed her the moment the father died." he wrote.
He said that before dying, the mother had put all properties in Sridevi's name. But her sister put a case on her demanding half the property claiming that her mother was insane and not in her senses when she signed the will due to the brain surgery. So in effect the woman desired by millions in the world was all alone in the world except for one Boney. Varma said that except for a short glimmer of English Vinglish (her comeback film), Sridevi had been pretty much very unhappy.
"More than the external peace, her internal mental state was of a high degree of concern and this caused her to look at her own self. She was the most beautiful woman for so many people. But did she think she was beautiful?, the filmmaker asked rhetorically. For the filmmaker, Sridevi “always came across as very shy, insecure and low on confidence.”
"Not because of her fault, but because she was thrust with fame from a very young age that never gave her a chance to be independent and be what she could really be and really wanted to be. She had to put on the make-up and be somebody else not just in front of the camera, but also behind the camera," he said. Varma says that she was scared whether her daughters -- elder one Jhanvi, who is set to make her Bollywood debut with Dhadak and younger one Khushi, would be accepted.
He also states that many suicides and accidental deaths happen after big parties or weddings. “That’s because people with depression and insecurities can’t understand why the whole world is so happy and enjoying, but they are not able to feel the happiness inspite of all the glitter and spotlight. That reminds them that they are deeply sad and that there is nothing wrong with the world and the fault is with just them that they are not able to feel anything. Some people who are very deeply depressed commit suicide. Others, just to control their depression and anxiety, take extra pills not knowing that it can be dangerous in certain doses and conditions.”
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