ADVERTISEMENTREMOVE AD

QSatire: Four Gifts We’d Like to Gift Salman Khan on His Birthday

On Salman Khan’s birthday, we’ll like to gift him a Tinder account that’ll make his dating women less complicated.

Updated
story-hero-img
i
Aa
Aa
Small
Aa
Medium
Aa
Large

It’s Sallu Bhai’s happy wala birthday and this year it’s extra special because bhai turns 50, though he does not look his age at all.

We all know how Salman Khan is the Santa Claus of the film industry. So we at The Quint decided to gift this desi Santa Claus something special on his day of the year.

ADVERTISEMENTREMOVE AD

The Marriage Handbook

Age might not be on his side, but his looks (even if surgically enhanced) definitely are. But it’s time to take baby steps and turn his bachelor pad into a vibrant home. For all we know, marriage is what he needs to reduce his craziness quotient and bring in some stability.

And honestly, his bachelorhood graph is not too impressive (considering all the women you’ve dated).

Tinder is the App for Bhai

Salman Bhai has always found love in a hopeless place – Bollywood. The true Bollywood Devdas has always had a tragic end to his love story, but not anymore. It’s time to introduce Bhaijaan to the world of Tinder and broaden his horizon. Hopefully, he will be able to find his true love and keep her away from the prying eyes of other actors.

ADVERTISEMENTREMOVE AD

Game On!

Video games are the most fascinating and an awesome gift for boys. And for Salman Khan it’s the best, as it would keep him out of trouble and to save some rare species of animals in India.

To ensure bhai never ventures out alone in the forest, how about gifting him a custom-made video game that would allow him to hunt all kind of wild animals without getting into trouble?

ADVERTISEMENTREMOVE AD

Looking for a Social Media Executive

For a brief period, Sallu bhai turned into Bajrangi Bhaijaan in real life and tweeted what he felt was true (remember tweets on Yakub Memon) because “hum Bajrang Bali ke bhakt hain, jaan dedenge par jhoot nahi bolenge”. Salman had his daddy dear defending him and calling his comment “childish”.

So why trouble the poor man and upset fellow Indians (like you’ve noticed, we are pretty intolerant to such things), and hire a social media executive who can keep a tab on his tweets and edit them.

(At The Quint, we question everything. Play an active role in shaping our journalism by becoming a member today.)

Published: 
Speaking truth to power requires allies like you.
Become a Member
×
×