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‘Neerja’ Came Into My Life and Changed it Forever: Sonam Kapoor

Sonam Kapoor tells The Quint about how inspired she is by Neerja Bhanot’s courage, and what she has learnt from it.

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We were all taken aback when Sonam Kapoor was chosen to play Neerja Bhanot, the fearless Pan Am flight attendant, who gave her life to save passengers on board, back in 1986. But after watching the film’s trailer, the surprise seems to be fading away. She’s been criticised for her acting skills and public faux pas, but Sonam has emerged as a better and stronger person from it all. And it’s all thanks to Neerja. The fashionista and leading lady tells us all about her struggles in the film industry, and how Neerja has changed her life forever.

Q: When was the first time you heard about Neerja?
Sonam Kapoor: It was in my subconscious, like I knew there was a girl called Neerja. But there are so many other historical figures who are more famous, who are more popular, who are more talented. So if you would have asked me three years ago, ‘Sonam who is your hero?’ I would say Sarojini Naidu, I would say Lata Mangeshkar, I would say Waheeda Rehman, Jhansi ki Rani. You know, these people made history. Somebody can sing, it’s a god given talent. Somebody is a queen, somebody is a talented actor. But these are talented extraordinary people who’ve already got the opportunity to showcase their talent. But who was Neerja? What did she do that made her relevant?

She was just a middle class girl who went to Bombay Scottish and St. Xavier’s ya. Just like one of us. Her father was a journalist at HT, her mother was a housewife, her brothers used to work for Nikita Shah. You know what I mean? It was like an ordinary family. She had a boyfriend. You know how like most air-hostesses do modelling on the side? She used to do that, she was a normal girl. But she was highly principled, she believed in doing the right thing and she was honest. She was not particularly strong or trained in a military space or anything. But what she did was so extraordinary, just because she was compassionate and she had the strength of spirit.

I was like, this person should be my hero because this just shows that every human being has the capacity of being extraordinary, by just doing the right thing. By standing up for what they believe in. A lot of people are god giftedly talented, and some can train themselves to be something. But this is just an extraordinary strength of spirit.

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Q. When you were offered this film, what was your reaction?
SK: I wanted to do it because I thought this film has to be made. So if I have to do it, I’ll do it. First I thought ‘why is it that it has come to me?’ There has to be a reason. And if it has come to me, I better do justice to this. It has been written by Saiwyn and Sanyukta. They are like amazing writers. It was Saiwyn’s idea to write the story and I am fully grateful. And then they took it to Ram. Ram developed it and then they sat with Atul.

Because I used to keep telling my agents, ‘what is this stuff that you are getting me’ and that I want to do more creative stuff, they were like ‘let’s just create something for her’ and this just fell into their lap, and they decided to make this film and to make this film happen for me. When it came to me, I was like how do I play her? So I was like I just need to start believing in everything that she believed in, because that’s what made her extraordinary.

Q. Did it change you as a person?
SK: I think we all have those values when we are younger. To do the right thing, to do your duty. We learn all this in school, from mom-dad. But over the years life makes us jaded, and I remember two and a half or three years ago, when this film came to me. I got to a point where I was like ‘why am I standing up for so many things when people are just so nasty to me about it? Why am I saying these things?’

I am just on the receiving end. Even if I am doing the right thing, I am on the receiving end of so much negativity. By being honest, by being truthful, by being correct, by making sure like I am not planting articles, actually there was a lot of damage happening to my PR, to my image because I refused to play the game.

There was a lot of negativity. Like, a lot of people do and they do it behind the scenes and they do it really shadily. And I used to be like, ‘if somebody is doing this behind the scenes, I am just going to say whatever I have to say and just be blunt about it’, because I don’t want to play these games. I was just too idealistic to do that.

Like three years ago, I was like, ‘you know what forget it! I am going to be diplomatic I don’t care because at the end of the day it’s just impacting my life. Let me just be selfish for one day.’

Her fear gave her courage to fight back. Here is the second poster of #Neerja! releasing Feb 19 2016!

A photo posted by sonamkapoor (@sonamkapoor) on

And my mom used to be like, ‘don’t change who you are beta. Eventually it will pay you back’. I was like, ‘mom it’s been like five years in the industry and it’s like I have to start from scratch every time, because I do not know how to play those games. I do not know how to do this kind of PR, and I don’t know how to do this and that’. My mind doesn’t function that way.

So maybe you know, I need to change. I kid you not, once I made that decision this script came to me. And then I was like ‘Oh my god, this girl had to die for me to understand that I can’t change who I am?’ She sacrificed her life for what she believed in and she impacted so many lives.

So if I impact even two people, and it harms me in some way, I am not dying from it right? She died. I am still blessed enough to have this kind of life, so I need to stop feeling sorry for myself and just go on and believe in what I have to say. So I feel I was about to lose my way and then Neerja came into my life, and just cemented what I believed in. So I don’t get upset anymore when people are playing all those games, or if I say something about some ban, or if I say something about something relevant, and if I get negativity and hate. Because I know there are six-seven other people who are getting inspired. And for me, that impact is more important than anything else.

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Q. What is the bravest thing you think you have done in your life?

The bravest thing that I have done honestly is to be myself. I think very few people are brave enough to be themselves. Everybody is so scared to be themselves.

SK: I am telling you, it is really simple. There are very few people who can be themselves, especially when they are in the limelight.

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